Naming and Joining as Kin
Many parents nowadays make the choice not to have their baby baptised into any formal religion, preferring the child to make their own mind up as to which spiritual path is right for them, if any, when they reach adulthood. However they do wish to celebrate their naming with friends and family in a ceremony.
Yes, there is no legal requirement for naming other than registering the birth within six weeks of the event which is done by the Registrar for births at the office which serves the area in which the child was born.
Parents or grandparents often conduct the naming ceremony or invite someone from their own spiritual path to do this for them, those with no formal belief may ask a close friend. Some choose to ask an experienced celebrant to conduct the ceremony so that family and friends are free to enjoy the day.LifeRites holds a register of celebrants able to conduct the ceremony and guide the parents on what to include.
Anywhere, at home, in the garden, in a hall or in woodland, the choice is yours Obviously access to the venue should be taken into account and also if there are those who would find a trek into the country too much for them. The weather should be taken into account if the ceremony is planned out of doors.
Again it is up to personal choice. Those who ascribe to a nature based spirituality may wish to call upon the elements of air, fire water and earth to bless the naming and also which ever deity is appropriate to
them. Those with no formal belief may wish to introduce the child to the earth on which they will live, the sky under which they will live, nature or the universe.
Many people choose sponsors who promise to look after the child and bring them up in the way in which the parents wish. These sponsors are the equivalent of the christian godparents. The sponsors may make a formal promise and give the child a token of this and may choose to represent one of the four elements. The parents also may make promises to bring the child up to know the right way to live.
Other friends and family may also wish to give a gift with their blessing, it is an idea to have a book in which people can write a message and advice for the child to keep.
A special lantern (or the lantern used for the welcoming at birth) may be lit or a tree or shrub may be planted at this time. If a tree or shrub specially dedicated to the child has been planted in a prior ceremony, it may be transplanted to a permanent place at this time (dependent on the appropriate time of year).
You may anoint the child with perfumed oil or water as their name is spoken, a secret name may be given- one that the child may use in a spiritual context once they reach adulthood.
A chalice may be given to the child and used for all share wine, a special cake may also be baked and shared.
It is usual to have a celebratory meal and this can be during or after the ceremony. This may be accompanied by music and dancing.
It is also usual to give thanks for the gift of a child to both deity (if used) and the parents
It may be appropriate here to mention adoption. Parents adopting a child may wish to have a ceremony to welcome the child into the family and to mark the taking of the family name. Naming may not be the most appropriate title for a ceremony of this nature perhaps “Joining as Kin” would be better This ceremony may follow the same format as a naming ceremony or may follow ideas set out below.
Joining as kin is also a suitable ceremony for the amalgamation of families where partners each have children from a previous partnership. This ceremony may help to cement the new family structure. A Candelabra with one central candle surrounded by candles for each of the people joining as kin or candles placed in a circle around a central candle is set. Each person lights their candle at the beginning of the ceremony and then lights a taper from their candle and all light the central candle from their tapers at the same time.
For both adoption and joining as kin ceremonies other aspects of the naming ceremony may be incorporated, again perhaps the family may plant a tree or light a family lantern and ask for blessing. Sponsors may also be chosen and promises made by each of the new family one to another.
LifeRites has a national network of Registered Celebrants who will be happy to conduct and/or advise on specific or general ceremonies where the individual does not wish to do this themselves. If you wish to request this service, please write to the address on the front of this leaflet, enclosing a stamped, self-addressed envelope. Please give as much information as to your spiritual path (if appropriate), location and date of the ceremony.